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Below you will find the following elements: mirth, joy, humor, mockery, insinuation, sport, politics, comedy, rants, awkwardness, opinions, communacable disease, self-promotion, and lingo. Enjoy.

Monday, July 31, 2006

This Is About Me

I had a busy weekend. Why do you care? You're reading this aren't you? Whammy. RUYA. Anyway, I did a lot.

I witnessed the matrimony of my very good friend's younger sister. Everything about this was wondrous. As a now wedding veteran (weteran), I can appreciate when things are done well. Everything was just executed. Note: this wedding was the 'Iceman' of weddings: because that is how he flies; ice cold, no mistakes.

Transportation to various venues was handled, the ceremony was concise and tight, the various parties were organized well for maximum mirth.

I moved. Ewwwwwwwwww. RUMA. Fact: if you move, it will always be the hottest possible day and you will have an aggressive lather throughout.
Fact #2: Moving sucks. #1 sucky thing that normal members of society have to deal with.

I attended a bbq of celebration for my boy Jon who just took the bar (I learned you don't congratulate them until they pass) and is moving to the newer version of York City in the newer version of York the state.

I did a show at the Colonial Tavern in Fredricksburg, VA. Comedic studs Justin Schlegel, Jared Stern, and Larry Poon were part of a great lineup. We all had a blast. Thanks to the Tavern and Adam Dodd for hooking us up. The show was long...like really long but the crowd hung with it. I saw one girl bleeding from the ears. One girl in the front would take breaks and turn completely away from the stage. Aggressive.

Its going to be stupid hot today, tomorrow, and Wednesday. I blame computers.

Wednesday I'll be at Rendezvous Lounge in Adams Morgan. Support this show because it can be a great spot for comics to perform. Knowledge: 2226 18th St NWWashington, DC 20009

Out.

Friday, July 28, 2006

Nuptuals

Thanks to Jimmy Merritt and the Comedy Spot. Show last night was a lot of fun. I had a great time on stage even though I wasn't particularly 'funny' or 'good' or 'worth the price of admission'.

Tonight, I go to the Rehearsal Dinner for my very good friend's younger sister. We are all happy for her but decidedly freaked out that she is going to be wed. She's happy which is clearly the most important thing but at no time did anyone involved stop me and ask me how I felt about it. Am I ready for that kind of commitment? No. Am I ready for my surrogate younger sister to be married? Negative. Am I entirely comfortbale with the fact that at a certain point, there will be a circle around me on the dance floor? yes.

Moving during a wedding weekend is like being punched in the arm by Ivan Drago before Rocky took his confidence.

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Calling All Video Game Dorks!

Dudes,

My first article was just published on IGN.com. It is entitled 'Lighten Up' and it will hopefully become a regular column. This is joyous on stilts. The full article is only available to IGN Insider Subscribers. If any of you already subsicribe, view the article freely HERE.

I am now a professional writer. My English teachers were all wrong...every single one of them.

How to Bomb at 2 Venues in One Day

1) Be Danny Rouhier
2) Go to an AIDS benefit show that started 30 minutes late.
3) Make sure the show is completely not designed for comedy
4) Follow a woman playing a bongo drum, a poet, and a Cuban female story-teller that tells a boring story about brothers named 'Tito' and 'Tati'. Ensure that she has a completely stereotypical accent like she is doing a female 'Scarface'.
5) Make sure the crowd has no idea comedy is coming on next.
6) try and get them going and soon realize its going to be useless.
7) entertain the one guy in the crowd that likes you.
8) ask him to hang out and get turned down.
9) Rush to Dremos
10) Perform for an apathetic crowd
11) mail in your effort because you don't think you can do well
12) Feel terrible about yourself because Jeff Maurer absolutely ripped in one of the greatest comedic performances I have ever seen (actually totally serious about that. The crowd was totally not into it and Jeff was relentless. They had no choice but to laugh. It was just awesome. F-ing hilarious.).
13) Drown your sorrows in a Chipotle Burrito

Blogger is being especially pooptastic today. I wanted more things in here but blogger is a tempermental and vengeful internet god. He is not a tame blogger. I do not believe that this 'Hyperlink' will work but you can copy and paste it into your browser.

My girlfriend works for a supertight floral design company which designs florals. The company is called Petals Edge (www.petalsedge.com). They are up for an award from WUSA channel 9 locally. Winning means they get wondrous glory and stuff. Here is the link to the contest. http://wusa9.cityvoter.com/TheList.aspx?Cat=87&SCat=997It takes 10 seconds and is easy. If you care about the right team winning and being just, do it. Its the right thing to do. Vote for Petals Edge because we can all make a difference.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Danger Danger...

I saw 'An Inconvenient Truth' last night. I must say that it was not what I expected. I was terrified at the prospect of Al Gore (fellow St. Albans School alum. Respect) talking at me for 2 hours. I was pleasantly surprised. The film is really well done. The material is riveting enough and the film is really well shot. I can see why it did so well at those little festivals of film they have to make makers of film feel important.

The message is obviously pretty clear. There were some things that I wish were a little different about the material in the film though. Here they is:

1) I wish he hadn't taken the swipes at the current administration. We all get it. We're already seeing your movie. I thought that was beneath the level that the movie established.

2) We all know that this administration has been terrible on the environment. No one is arguing that. But weren't you part of an administration for 8 years? It wasn't like the trends you are warning us about slowed down at all from '92-'00. Core democratic constituencies have traditionally included factory workers...as in factories that are causing a huge chunk of the problem. My point is, Democrats have been able to point fingers at Republicans for years saying that they don't care about the environment and are not willing to sacrifice jobs and economic prosperity to save the decaying environments. Well, some tough choices had to be made and it wasn't like Democrats were making them either. NAFTA wasn't the best news for environmentalists.

3) I wish there was more in there about: 'Here is exactly what you can do right now to help'. I think Joe and Jane American could really benefit from something like that. There are tons of easy ways to help the cause that have nothing to do with political beliefs. Many people feel like the environment is too big an issue for them to do anything about so they say 'F*ck it' and do nothing. Here is an incredibly easy list of things that we can do in our every day lives that make a huge difference: KNOWLEDGE. A lot of these things actually reduce your expenses which people should definitely know. Why don't they know them? Because little cost saving techniques are not good for energy companies and fuel efficiency isn't good for big oil.

What strikes me as funny, not really funny 'haha' more like: 'really?...the whole fist?, is that my opinions have now become congruent with super green party liberals. I have written before that the most important thing for us to do moving forward is to eliminate our dependence on foreign oil. Greens are arguing the same thing (although we obviously got there via different paths). If Al Gore does run in '08, which I hope he does, he is absolutely getting my vote because I believe he will take that issue on.

The thing that 99.9% of Americans do not realize is that the change to 'earth friendly' is going to sting...for a while. Like its going to hurt. Maybe its 5 years, maybe 10, or more. Factories will close, laborers will be jobless, the cost of goods is going to increase a lot (as a side, I have always felt this the most important element in our economy. Consumers need to spend and they need 'confidence' to do that. Confidence comes from value. People need to perceive that they are getting good value for their money otherwise they don't spend it) as we will be without efficient production and transportation means for a time, and the last and most terrifying element of all of this? Terrorism.

Right now, we are completely dependent on foreign oil; specifically OPEC and even more specifically, Saudi Arabian oil. There has been an unholy alliance with Saudi Arabia for more than 50 years where we keep their corrupt ruling body in power with mind boggling petro $, and in exchange, they buy our defense goods. Did you know that? The Saudis are our #1 consumers of Boeings and McDonald Douglas and such. No one spends a greater % of their GDP on defense than the Saudis. (For those interested, suck back Robert Baer's 'Sleeping With The Devil'. A chilling account of our relations with the Saudis.)

Did you also know that the ruling family, spends enormous amounts of $ on the creation and maintenance of religious schools throughout SA and the Middle East? These schools have messages of hate throughout the day against the West blaring over a loudspeaker. These are the schools that produced ALL of the 9/11 hijackers. What do you think is going to happen when the unholy alliance ends? What do you think will happen when we take our money out from under the noses? They'll just fade into the background? Content that as the ruling family, they controlled over 90% of the countries wealth and an entire population ready for revolt, and when the $ goes away just say, 'it was fun while it lasted'?

Here's an example: right after 9/11 the price of oil stayed consistent and low. Why? Because our dear Saudi friends agreed to pump millions of extra barrels per day without hesitating. We are tied to them at the hip. If they wanted to, right now, they could put us into a huge recession. Huge. 1/6 of the world's oil reserves come from right there.

That is an inconvenient truth.

See what I did? I used the title of the film there for a zinger finishing line...

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

The Tightness

I saw the tightness yesterday. The tightest apartment in Washington, DC. I have a chance...not great...but a fighting chance and that's all you can ask for.

I'm busy this week.

My good buddy's younger sister is getting married this weekend. I still have a gag reflex in my mouth when I say that. She is like my little sister in that she is way too young to talk to boys. The irony of it all is that she is like 6'7" and the tallest female on record since the beginning of record keeping. Is that irony?

My special lady friend is fantastic.

Comedy Spot on Thursday with a couple dudes with high levels of hilarity. I know my boys Jeff Maurer and Seaton Smith will be there. The show was put together by Jimmy Merritt. Jimmy was one of the mortals at the Geek Comedy Tour 3000 in NYC. Jimmy shot the audience with figurative phasers and meaphorical rocket launchers.

The show should be super like if Voltron ate Superman because you are what you eat.

Monday, July 24, 2006

Blogger Mutha F*(^%#

Blogger sucks today. I had an epic post for you peeps but Blogger has not seen fit to allow me to post until now. Suffice it to say, that the Geek Comedy Tour 3000 ripped the mic at the HOPE 6 Conference. HOPE stands for Hackers OF Planet Earth. The crowd was suprisingly tight as everyone on the show crushed. Great times. Thanks to everyone for being involved in a little taste of mirth.

I bowled on Saturday. This is a superb way to pregame and enjoy the company of others. Wondrous. I did not bowl particularly well but it is a venture that should be done by humans.

The Newer Version of York City, was the sweatiest place of all time this past weekend. From the moment I stepped out of the shower at my boy's apartment, I began to perspire and had varying degrees of lather throughout the day (gentle to aggressive). Complete sweatbox.

There is a place in The Newer Version of York City where you can get 2 hotdogs and a mixture of fruity juices for $2.75. This is good.

I ate cupcakes from the Magnolia Bakery on Sunday. This is the super tight bakery featured in the 'Lazy Sunday' video from SNL. Note: the cupcakes really are the best I have ever had. Absolutely phenomenal.

I am busy this week. Many appearances and social engagements plus the housing search is ongoing. It is difficult being an extremely popular young adult.

Saturday, July 22, 2006

Geek Comedy Tour

Was off the chains last night in NYC. Mirth was everywhere. We all crushed. Reports of these events to come later. Joyous to see my NYC compatirots.

Word

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Please

don't be angry with me. I didn't really have a chance to post today. I am not going to break the streak though...even if its meaningless...the streak I mean. As Crash Davis said: 'You don't f*ck with a streak..."

Write that down.

I have seen 2 houses that are group situations in the last two days. I am not going to get either of them I don't think. I want to get both and then start a bidding war. Old school right there.

The heat sucks. I am a sweaty dude and there is very little that I despise more than being sweaty in work clothes. If I am outside for more than 8 seconds, I begin to sweat. Changes must occur. Either I roll in cutoffs...or I don't roll.

The Big Lebowski is one of the 20 greatest movies ever made. This is a litmus test for the quality of a dude. If he does not like the BL or 'has only seen parts of it', he should not be your friend and you should make fun of him behind his back.

www.durkl.com

McDonalds is gross but there is nothing like the smell when you are hungry. It is intoxicating.

One of the main reasons I don't work out as much as I should is because I hate doing laundry.

I am beginning the new car process. I have grown weary of my present vehicle. Next for me? Diesel baby. Better for the environment, way more efficient in terms of gas mileage and performance, and really cool to say. "My car is diesel". Whammy

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Classic from the Archives...

My boy Dan became engaged recently. I am re-racking the post I wrote many moons ago when another friend of mine decided to only make kissy with one female forever. It still holds a lot of truth I think...Enjoy:

A Simple 12 Step Guide to Reacting to the News That Your Boy is Engaged

By Danny Rouhier

Phase 1: Disbelief - 38 seconds of silence with mouth open and expression like a 13 year old girl hearing about her friend giving out a calrissian to a junior in high school

Phase 2: Questions - the phrases: "Oh my God" and "are you kidding me?" and "that's unbelievable" are used for a 15 minute period

Phase 3: Reflection: the thought of "what does this mean for me?" is batted around. Respondent wonders how exactly this news affects him and what duties he may have. For deeper thinkers, their own place in the universe is analyzed and pondering of their own potential marital standing occurs. Further thought occurs analyzing other relationships and 'who will be next?'

Phase 4: Self Loathing- guilty feelings for phase 3 arise when respondent realizes the news is not about him.

Phase 5: Come to grips - "what's the bottom line here?" Respondent attempts to come to grips with the news in an effort to understand it, for the 'why' is a key element lost on the single 25 (now 27) year old with disposable income.

Phase 6: Jealousy - respondent feels a quick twinge of jealousy as he realizes that engaged person does not have to worry about kicking game to chicks and jumping through the irritating set of hoops necessary to procure intercourse.

Phase 7: Giggles - respondent laughs for a few seconds recalling Vince Vaughn's speech to Will Farrell about marriage from Old School and Will Farrell's speech to the relationship therapist about the waitress' underpants...her panties.

Phase 8: Re-focus- respondent realizes he has lost track of the real issue. Repeat Phase 2, begin Phase 3 and return anew to phase 2 for several minutes.

Phase 9: Frank Dialogue - respondent engages in conversation with others about the news. Phrases like: "dude, you knew this was coming" and "hey man, he's happy" are used.

Phase 10: Acceptance - respondent, upon completion of phase 9, says things like: "Yeah man, I guess you're right", "its so cool that he's happy"

Phase 11: F___ the system! - after Phase 2 again, respondent then gets upset at prices of engagement rings, the year long process of girls throwing their left hand around and the secretly jealous but outwardly happy faces other girls display at the sight of the condensed carbon, plus constant discussions of inane details of wedding plans that only matter to girls.

Phase 12: Realization and Self-Actualization - repeat phase 2, respondent realizes that bachelor party and actual wedding will be great parties and is once again at peace.

Congratulations Mike (Dan).

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Making It Difficult

In searching for a new home to house the humor, I found that I like to use alliteration. I also found an interesting phenomenon. On craigslist, in the housing search area, not in the awkward 'wish I had talked to you passive aggressive non-committal post' section (missed connections), you will find a number of situations like this one:

http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/doc/roo/183280922.html

Its a female looking for another female because the last female didn't work out. I have no problem with indicating who you would wish to live with. Totally down with that. I just find it interesting that there are way more female living situations on craigslist than 'must be male'. Why? I have an answer. In terms of betting, a female living situation (more than 2 girls in the same enclosure) have 3/2 odds of failure, leading to a complete house breakdown and subsequent evacuation or one female leaving with upset feelings. Why is this? Females feel secure in packs. When Alexander Hamilton said that 'factions were inevitable' he didn't mean political parties, he meant women ganging up on someone to feel better about themselves.

Think about this. If you are walking or driving in a major city and you see a girl walking alone, take a mental note of the % of them that will be talking on their cell phones. It will be very high. Like in the 90s. The remaining % are either waiting for a call...anxiously or are those really angry girls that try to come off as super-confident but are really not. Seriously. Observe it.

What does this tell us? Simple, women do not like to be alone. They do not like feeling lonely. Some may value private time, and this doesn't always go for all women, but women need alliances constantly. Most men do not. Every dude at one point or another, has been sitting quietly at his house, comfortable as all get out, doing something enjoyable by himself. He has then debated whether or not to join the others at another venue...really debated...and at least once, he has stayed in; not because he was tired, but because he didn't feel like seeing anybody.

Back to the original point, if they ever create the ability to bet on housing situations, find a 4 house parlay with all women in each one, bet $100, and clean up. Also, be unbelievably careful if you are a female and are responding to one of those 'looking for a female roommate' posts. Chances are, the last one ended really poorly and so will this one. Note: it is always better to live with dudes. I firmly believe every girl should have to do this at some point for at least one year. Increases how cool a girl is by an average of %34. I also believe that everyone should have to play youth sports until they are 10. After, that, whatever tickles your rainbow.

Monday, July 17, 2006

Drug People

I actually have a special place in my heart for drug people. I don't do drugs. I've never smoked anything, or swallowed anything, or stabbed myself with a needle and taken something intervenously (no idea how to spell that word). All that said, I find drug people (and by drug people I mean people that use, have used, or plan to use a drug at least once per month) amusing.

My favorite thing about drug people is how they are always coming up with a new way to justify their use of their drug of choice. "Smoking really balances me out...its like...I'm more me when I smoke..." Nope, you just like to smoke weed. Just say that. Stop rationalizing it. You sound like a fruit cup.

My boy Ryan Conner has a wondrous joke about how he wishes pot were leagalized so pot heads had nothing else to talk about.

Still looking for a living situation. They should make a documentary about this process. It is really so beat. Its like, flat tire on the highway at 3AM beat.

Friday, July 14, 2006

Quick Hits

Late afternoon blogs are hot right now.

Ran into Joe Robinson last night. He is funny. Good dude.

Also ran into Rob Maher last night. Also a good dude that makes good humor.

That's all I have to say about that.

Looking for a place to live is like looking for a penny that you think you may have had in the 80s...or the G-spot...which is what I call a decent place in Georgetown. Zing Zam Zipperoo!

Thursday, July 13, 2006

The Move Memo

I'm not going to be at my computer much today. Our office is being renovated and people are going to be moving around like ants under a foot. Thus, I wanted to give you all something albeit brief.

One of my favorite all-time soccer players, Zinedine Zidane, got a red card in his final match in the World Cup Final. Here is knowledge about his apology: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/07/12/AR2006071201184.html

As you can read, this is not an apology. He is sorry that it happened but not apologetic for taking action. This is the World Cup Final. The biggest tournament in the world for the world's sport. Your team needs you. I don't care how provoked you are. I don't care what the Italian dude said. Your team needs you on the field. You know what? If it was that bad, find him after the game and whoop his a$$. If you are the best player in the world (many would argue but he's in the discussion), people are going to take shots at you. That's the deal (see the 'Jordan Rules' in '89-90'). The Italian dude could say the worst thing imaginable to you and you absolutely 100% have got to let it go. By getting kicked out, you let down your whole team and your whole country. Sub out the dude from France who missed his kick and put Zidane in there and maybe the outcome is different...

Think about it. The Italian dude got exactly what he wanted. Worst case scenario for him? Both of you get kicked out. That's a sacrifice he definitely would have made 10/10 times.

If you disagree with this, you're wrong and you don't understand sport. If you are part of a team, truly part of a team, then your interests are always secondary and you put the team first. You do whatever you have to do to help your teammates reach their goals. This does not include letting someone get under your skin with an outlandish and untrue insult and headbutting him in the chest.

I have a new joke about little league baseball that I believe will turn into a magical ferry ride of mirth for any who hear it...

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Don't You Hate It...

When your work life gets in the way of your personal life as well as your 2nd career? Currently involved in such a quandry. Apologies for my brevity.

Also, just got word that I have been bumped off the shows at the Comedy Factory this weekend. Annoying. But, its the type of thing that happens in this silly little thing we call comedy all the time. I'll be back Baltimore. Fear not. Save me a mugging outside of those filthy strip clubs around the corner from the Factory where I went that one time with Justin Schlegel.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

People in Action

I have mentioned it before. Here is my proposal:

No children under 5 on flights longer than 3 hours. I paid close to $1300 for a roundtrip to France and on my overnight flight over there, I sat in the blast zone for a screaming little piece of sh*t kid and his astoundingly incapable baby-factory of a parent. Astonishing. We were delayed for close to 2 hours at Dulles and then another 30 minutes at Charles De Gaulle bringing the total duration on the flight to 10 hours. Of these 10 hours, this little bastard was not screaming for 1.5 hours. This is where his older brother would pick up the slack and begin to cry and wail. In total, 30 minutes of quiet.

Its one thing if you have an infant. Hey, its tough, babies cry. Kids that are least 3 and can walk and talk are not allowed to cry for 8.5 hours straight without reproach. This idiot mother refused to silence the child. She coddled and coddled and made no apologies. Put a 3 year old me in the same situation. After 3 minutes, my parents would have been so horrified, I would have been threatened, perhaps shaken. Either way, I piped down despite the fact that I was a complete spaz.

The Unbelievable B*tch Baby Factory (UBBF) was not done though. 2 shocking incidents occur.

1) UBBF stands up. I am in the aisle. Her inflated buttocks brush against my person several times. No reaction on her part. She is standing next to me as I try to sit and relax. Side note: always awkward when you are sitting and someone else is standing very close by. It becomes clear to me that she is changing this little b*tt sprite's diaper....less than 2 feet from my head. A) that f*cking kid can walk and talk. Its potty time. B) HOW IN THE NAME OF F*CK IS THIS ALLOWED? She holds a dirty diaper now in her left hand. 8-10 inches from my head.

"Excuse me! Can you please not waive that dirty diaper by my head?!"

UBBF: (In a french accent) 'Only a minute, the boy must be changed...'

Wow.

I hate this woman. I mean real hate. Not like, 'oh shucks, I hate it when the bus is late'. Like, if something bad happens...that's really good.

2) As we begin our descent into CDG (worst airport we have as humans) the UBBF begins to shout at me over her screaming child: 'Sir? Excuse me...Sir?'

I finally process that this stunning whore-faced idiot is talking to me. I turn to her...

UBBF: "When the plane lands...can I cut you?"

ME: "I'm sorry..."

UBBF: "I can cut you?"

Me: "I really don't understand..."

UBBF: "We have a connecting flight and maybe I can go and cut you (makes a go ahead of me motion)?"

Me: "Are you serious? Ma'am, after what you put me through on this flight? If it was up to me, you would be the last one off this plane. This is the worst flight I have ever been on so I hope you miss your connection." (laughter and mild applause by those around me)

UBBF makes a big production trying to play up the fact that she is a struggling mother. No one is buying it. She tries to console her child and says in a really loud voice: 'No no, mommy's back is failing so I cannot lift you'...crickets as she waits for sympathy. When we finally do stand up to get off the plane. She asks a woman behind me if she would be willing to carry her child because of said failing back. The woman, an American goes: "Absolutely not." Mint.

Back to the point. I paid a ton of $$ to fly and it was horrendous because of these people. Ban them. BAN THEM! PUT THEM ON SEPARATE FLIGHTS! I will gladly give the rest of my business for the rest of my life to the first airline that does not allow children under 5 to fly. No matter if I can save a hundred dollars on another flight. That's my pledge. I will fly with them exclusively forever and I am not alone. Do it...do it...

Monday, July 10, 2006

Random Informational Tidbits

-When you post that you have an apt for rent on craigslist from France at 2Am local time, when you get home Sunday afternoon to the States, you will have 147 responses.

-When you travel to France, they will be playing in the World Cup and continue to win until you leave. Each victory will send the entire nation into a frenzy. You will be at a super-tight function on the Saturday when Brazil gets upset by France at the most popular bar on the Champs d' Elyses and when the game ends, you will go outside and see the most wondrous spectacle in the world. People will be celebrating into the morning and there will be 10s of thousands of people parading around the streets. People will be on fire and this will be normal. No one has ever had more mirth than those thousands of humans.

-Finding a place to live sucks. Also, the physical act of moving makes you play the 'would you rather...' game. You will decide that you would rather get kicked in the shin once per day while simultaneously getting a steel pipe to the funny bone than move.

-When your friends get married in Paris, you will ride upon a giant and joyous yacht. You will go up and down the Seinne through the highlights of Paris. You will realize that you don't belong there and hope that no one notices because its so tight.

-You will sweat like a prison snitch as you are in the center of the dancing circle. For the rest of the trip, the groom's father will call you: 'Michael Jackson'. You ignore the possible implication that you like to make dirty with young boys and focus on the dancing elements.

-When you go to the Alps with your peeps, you will miss your boy Michel. Also, you will have a startling realization that you are in 1/10 the shape you were 2 years ago when you went on the hikes. You will play a little game with yourself where you try to convince yourself and others that's its because you have been boozing for 8 straight nights and just had minor toe surgery but you will know that its because you are a slob.

-You will be appearing at the Baltimore Comedy Factory this weekend with Comedic Stud Nick DiPaolo. Show schedule is on the site but you will repeat it to reinforce the info: Thursday@ 8, Friday @8, 10, and 12, Saturday @ 7, 9, and 11.

Information session...complete.

Read the 'Power of One'. It is mint.

Saturday, July 08, 2006

A Layer of Filth

Greetings. I write to you from an internet.com cafe in Paris France at 1:00 AM. I return to the United States tomorrow. I am covered in a filmy and palpable layer of disgusting filth that may never wash off. Stories abound. I have seen more mirth and wonder in the past 12 days then most men get to see in 35. Redonkulous. That is not a word but you know exactly what I mean.


Completely unrelated but more important topic. I am in the midst of a housing emergency. I have to move as I have been afforded an opportunity. I live in a great apartment in Glover Park. Since I wasn't able to give the 30 days notice, I need someone to sublet for August then you can do whatever you want with the place as it is a month to month lease. 2 Bedrooms, living room, potty, kitchen, and other stuff. Great space. View knowledge on my craigslist posting.

I love the United States of America so much...but we don't have anything as cool as watching England play soccer with English Soccer Hooligans...