The Get Fresh Crew

I blog to tell you a story. Most won't appreciate it. Those that do will think it the tightness.

Last week, I'm at an event. It was a charity event. It was winding down. I was about to leave. A man walks into the place. The venue was huge and wondrous. I'm booking it for my birthday (funny danny note: no I'm not. It would cost more than I could potentially make in 47 years). The dude that walks in is on an iphone. He is also typing on a sidekick. He is not who he once was. I recognize him but I am still not sure it's who I think it is...that was a confusing sentence.

The man, who is a good 40 pounds heavier than when I first bought his audio cassette tape many years ago. He looks around the room...he isn't sure where to go. Someone guides him over to the registration desk. He meanders over to the unknowing chicks managing the station. They ask him his name...

He pauses from his phone call...and his sidekick. He looks up and says: "Doug E Fresh". The chicks have no idea who he is. One asks: 'OK...it's Mr. Fresh?'

He repeats his name. It is awkward. I am watching this whole scene unfold and I roll over quickly and say:

"ladies, this is Doug E Fresh. I own all his cassette tapes."

He responds: 'Aaaiiight. Where I go to?'

I took him over to where the VIPs had been hanging out earlier. Most have cleared out as the event was winding down. There were several athletes present including several former greats.

Fast forward. Doug E Fresh is talking to the guy that put on the event. I spoke to the organizer earlier and he calls me over. The two of them are talking and name dropping. I don't have much to contribute. I finally jump in during a lull. Here is the convo:

Me: 'Doug, lemme ask you this. You've been in the game for so long, do you ever get wowed by a star? Like, Derrick Jeter was here earlier; is that impressive to you or is not a big deal?'

DEF: 'I mean, das like...I mean, I make raps. No-what-I'msayin', I make raps. Most da time, it's like nah son. I done that. But man, you meet dat dude and das' like: 'that n_ _ _ a made world series.'

Me: 'I totally understand.'

DEF: 'I came in and brought that knowledge. Them guys that was doin' it strong when I was young is like wow. Tony Dorsett was in here. That's one of the best running backs of all time.'

Me: 'Actually Doug, if you'll indulge me, I think it's irresponsible to place him among the great running backs of all time.'

(At this point, the organizer is looking at me like I'm a space alien on stilts taking a piss on a parade.)

DEF: 'Oh damn!'

Me: 'If you give me 10 seconds, I'll name you 5 better right now.'

DEF: 'Aight yo.'

Me: 'Walter Payton, Jim Brown, Barry Sanders, Gayle Sayers, Marshall Faulk'

DEF: 'Daaaaammmmmmn!'

(more looks of insanity from the organizer)

Me: 'I'll name 5 more right now. Eric Dickerson, Emmit Smith, Earl Campbell, Marcus Allen, and OJ Simpson; 2000 in a 14 game season!'

DEF: 'Oh sh*t son! Bringing dat noise...'

Me: 'I just can't stand it when a guy plays on great teams and is great by association. Dorsett was fine, but just because he was on great teams, don't anoint him into the pantheon. The thing he's most famous for is getting caught by Darrell Green on Monday Night Football.'

To summarize, I had a sports debate with Doug E Fresh (from the Get Fresh Crew) and I lectured him about how I believe that a cowboy was overrated. Personal highlight.

Some Baseball Facts

Here's an interesting thing that might only interest me and a few other people:

Here are the 4 teams left in the MLB playoffs:

Cleveland Indians
Colorado Rockies
Boston Red Sox
Arizona Diamondbacks

Here's the wikipedia entry for (fellow St. Albans Alum) Josh Byrnes:

"Josh Byrnes is currently the General Manager of the Arizona Diamondbacks of Major League Baseball. A graduate of Haverford College, he began his baseball career as an intern for the Cleveland Indians in 1994, quickly working his way up the organization ladder. In 1999 he was hired to fill the assistant GM position for the Colorado Rockies, a job he held for two years. He then took the same job under Theo Epstein and the Boston Red Sox until October 2005 when he was hired by the Diamondbacks to replace the departing interim GM Joe Garagiola Jr."

Lets go a bit more in depth. Byrnes was the director of scouting for the Indians until '99. Here's a quick look at some of the guys he scouted and were drafted under his watch:

CC Sabathia, Jhonny Peralta, Victor Martinez

He then left to become assistant GM of the Colorado Rockies in '99. Here's another quick look at players he acquired:

(closer) Manny Corpas, Brian Fuentes, Jeff Francis, Garrett Atkins, Jeff Baker, Corey Sullivan, Ryan Spillbourghs..basically, their starters besides Matt Holliday

He then left for the Red Sox in 2003. Another closer look:

Jonathan Papelbon, Dustin Pedroia, David Ortiz, Jacoby Ellsbury

Now he's the GM of the Diamondbacks:

Virtually the entire roster, assembled by Byrnes in the last 3 seasons since he arrived in 2005.

Memo to MLB coverage:

DO A STORY ABOUT JOSH BYRNES!!!

Saying Goodbye to This Thing I Love...

I quit soda. It's been 14 weeks. It hurts. All the time. I eat food, it reminds me of Coca Cola Classic. Burritos, hamburgers, steak, chips, sandwiches, boredom, video games, pasta, talking, driving...literally everything reminds me of soda. It's a healthy life choice. My lifestyle isn't the most healthy. I'm poor, I have a weird sched and the only food available is terrible for you. I don't play sports competitively anymore and it's time to make an adjustment.

Bottom line: this is so hard. I know. Piss and moan, blah blah blah. I don't care. Right now, I'm thinking about have a can of coke. Did you know that my mouth re-creates the aftermath of coca cola telling me it's time to have one?

I'm temping now. It's a necessary thing. Not much fun but it's gotta happen. The 0 positive cash flow is very 1994 summer.