A Scientific Study

First, Joe Robinson said some really nice things about me in his blog. Every word of it is true. Joe, I can't...you're married.

Moving on, why are offices always so hot? Like, they are warm when its cold outside but also when its hot outside. Its like, they are cool with being hot. This is a philosophical issue. There are two types of people in the world:

Type 1: People who would rather be hot then cold. They say things like: 'I like it tropical' or 'I have poor circulation'. Don't be friends with them.

Type 2: People who would rather be cold than hot. These people understand that when you are cold, you can fix it. You can put on more clothes, you can move around, you can get a blanket or a myriad of other things to fix your discomfort. When you are hot...you can only be so naked and not get arrested. You are f-ed. If it is not appropriate for you to be sweaty and its hot, you are totally f-ed in A with stick and sandpaper.

I sweat. I'm a warm dude and I will get sweaty. Its what dudes do. I only have one friend who is not a warm dude and we are not sure what his deal is. As a side, he can also fall asleep anywhere at any time. In high school, he would sit in the front of classes and just tilt his head back and be out. Its really funny. If my group of friends were in the X men and had mutant powers, his ability would be to fall asleep under any circumstances. Mine would be to get attention from everyone while my associates did stuff. Back to the point. Why are so many offices warm all the time. Time for science to step in...

Given: Many offices are warm to the point of discomfort for dudes.

Hypothesis: Its because there are now so many chicks in the workforce.

Experiment Data:
-Chicks are typically colder than dudes because there is less of them (in terms of mass).
-Women can now vote in nearly every state
-Its no longer 'just plain silly' for a woman to work
-work often takes place in an office environment
-In American society, if there is a choice between who will experience temperature discomfort between men and women, most often the men will get the RUTA (see weddings and any occasion where dudes have to wear suits, tuxedos, shirts/ties while honies wear dresses).

Conclusion: Offices are hot because women work in them.

What do we do about this? No you misogynists, we do not forbid women from working (although I'd like to tap into a little of that 'paternity leave' as long as we're handing out equality at the staff meetings...). I propose a union. DAH (Dudes Against Heat) will seek to lower office temperatures by several degrees everywhere. If it results in SNE (spontaneous nipple erection) for the honies, so be it. Either where something less slutty around the breasticle area, or wrap up if it bothers you. If not, I say let them be your guide. First meeting is with the heating and cooling guy, Emil, on the 2nd garage level where the temperature controls are. Let's do this...