Video Clip

Hey friends and others who are here now, nothing posted for a while.  Here is something!

This week

Some stuff coming up this week:

-I'm closing out the show at Ri-Ra this Wednesday in Arlington.  Never been, should be fun.  Show starts at 8.

-I'm closing out the show at the Topaz Bar in Dupont.  Been lots of times, should be fun.

-I'm featuring at Magooby's Joke House this weekend in Baltimore with Richie Byrne.  These shows should be a great time.  2 shows on Friday and Saturday at 8 and 10:15.  That's PM.

-I'll be on the morning show on 98 Rock on Thursday morning.  Listen live.

I tried to solve a rubik's cube for 4 hours last night.  Totally unsuccessful.

Come see me this week!

Little Big Guy

This Saturday the 18th of October, my buddy JL Cauvin is putting on a really cool show.  I'm on it which does not help the coolness I guess, but it's still happening.

The venue is the Triad Theater which is a great space for a show.  It's at 158 W 72nd Street.  Show starts at 9.  You've got to make reservations because it will sell out.

Go to www.triadnyc.com.  

Tix are $15 and you'll buy some adult sodas.  Should be a great time.

Check out the trailer for the show here at: www.jlcauvin.com.

Comedy Sucks

This is why people quit comedy.  You do shows which you hope let you do shows that you want and the whole thing was for nothing.  I know that didn't make sense.  

The point is, you keep putting these irons in the fire in hopes that something good will get created.  It really takes it's toll when you all you pull out is another piece of scrap metal time an time again.  You see other people making it and it breaks your heart.  Not because you don't want success for them, but because you know you deserve it too.  It's heartbreaking because it takes so much out of you and of the people around you.  You sacrifice and make them sacrifice too.  For what?  It's hard to see when you go through a lot and feel like you are right back where you started.  You can remember the good shows and that's what keeps you going.  You know you can do it and that, is literally the only thing to keep you going.  If you stunk, and couldn't crush ever, you wouldn't want this as bad.  Deep down you'd know that you don't deserve it.  But you do and here you are, wondering what the point is.

After the show I had tonight, I am having a really tough figuring it out.  The uncertainty makes me remember all horrendous times I've experienced since I started doing comedy.  They compound themselves in my mind like an avalanche of negativity.  Getting passed over, time and again is a slap in the face of some harsh reality.  Hope can only get you so far.  Eventually, you realize that NO ONE has your interests in mind.  Not ever.  That's as discouraging as anything else.

I'm not walking away just yet.  At the end of the day, week, month, or year I have to be able to look in the mirror and ask myself: 'did I do everything I possibly could to make it?'  I haven't yet.  I'm closer than I was before, but not yet.

Let me close by saying: F&*^@*(!!!!!!!!!

Shows Up and You Shows Up

I've got a show this Saturday at the Laugh Lounge.  It's a cool club in the LES.  It's an early show and should be a lot of fun.  A bunch of guys are getting looked at by the club so hopefully it's an opportunity for me to work a little bit.

Details:

Laugh Lounge

151 Essex Street (between Rivington and Stanton)

6:30 PM

$12 tix

Let me know if you want to come.

I'm trying to get to writing more often again.  (sounds of applause... dwindling...and gone)

Matchups

Who wins in a fight?

2 Jonas brothers vs John Mayer?

AC Slater from the wrestling episode on Saved By the Bell vs Chris Griffin in the Family Guy when he wrestles the imaginary bear?

Jennifer Aniston from the time she was on Mad TV vs. Courtney Cox from Masters of the Universe?

Paris: The City of Light Windy Apples

I just spent a week in Paris, France not Texas.  It was an amazing trip.  I'm broke now (not an update) but it was worth it.  There are so many incredible sights in this city and it's pretty easy to get around.  

Here are the differences between Paris and New York City.  Yes, this is definitive.

-The Subway system is incredible in Paris.  NYC Subway is good but doesn't hold a candle to Paris.  Here's why:

In Paris, the train comes every 4 minutes.  Literally.  Every line, always.  Every 4 minutes.

In NYC, it's easy to get uptown/downtown but getting east/west is often a pain in the an-us.  In Paris, the system is like a spiderweb with stations constantly intersecting.

-Everything is older in Paris.  You can walk by a neighborhood church, poke your head in, and see that it was built in 1648.  Pretty neat.

-They show American shows in Paris and their original tv programming is atrocious.  For episodes of Law & also Order, the add stuff like this: "How do you say...le.....BUM BUM".  Note: this is not true.

-The reputation for Parisians being rude is largely unfounded.  However, there are some times when you are astounded.  Examples:

1) We went to sit down and have a coffee.  There were 14 tables open.  We sat at one.  The waitress eventually comes over and asked us: "Etes-vous ici pour les dejeuner?"  Which means: 'Are you here for lunch?'

We said (in broken French): 'non. soulement pour cafe.'  Which is : 'no. Only for coffee'

The waitress then went on a tirade which we eventually realized was about the fact that we were not allowed to sit where we were sitting, with 13 other open tables, if we were only going to drink coffee.  We were made to move 6 feet to a different table that was not differently marked in any way.  There were no signs indicating this policy and no way of knowing which tables would cause someone to chastise paying customers because of their seating choices.

2) We were looking for a train station called the RER.  We asked a local: 'Ou est le RER station?'  He looked puzzled.  We each took turns trying to say: 'RER' with our best fraccent.  He continued to not understand.  Then finally, he shook his finger at us and said: 'oh...RER (in a fake American doing French accent)...non...'

Then he over-exaggerated the Frenounciation: 'est. EH-RRR-AAA-EH-RRR'.  He then pointed across the street no more than 150 feet from where we were standing.  Really dude?

Still, phenomenal trip.

I'm still really pissed at the bailout.  The thing I think that not enough people are saying (not enough people that can influence the decision anyway) is that the reason this call is being made is because our leaders are scared to tell Americans that we have to change the way we live.  From the top down, over the last 30 years, we've been living over our means.  We've borrowed and spent and borrowed some more.  This isn't just Wall Street, it's everyone.  It's the developers that continued to throw up McMansions, it's banks that frivolously lending, and people borrowing more than they could pay back, it's universities inflating tuition forcing people to borrow some more, it's US car companies refusing to plan for a future, but most of all, it's a lack of willingness to change our life styles.  God forbid anyone (meaning a politician) points the finger at us and says: 'you are living irresponsibly.  And it's time for a change.  We'll all be better off in the long run if you make a few sacrifices now.'  

This can't happen in today's climate.  One thing liberals and conservatives have in common these days is a place to put blame.  Each side has a boogeyman it can point to and say: 'Here's why we're fooked'.  Gone are the days of 'ask not what your country can do for you.'  We'll sit here now as this enormous band aid gets syphoned out of our pockets and pat ourselves on the head and tell ourselves that everything is OK now.  Well it isn't.  In years past, liberals would always want to blame the system for the failings of individuals and conservatives would always choose to blame the individuals, well, right now both sides would be right.

Quick Article

Great piece written very clearly on the Wall Street Crisis:

Washington Post Op-Ed piece.

The Bailout is Bullsh*t

This is political I guess.  Sorry, but it's important to me.  Giddyup.

This market bailout by the federal government is good in the short term (as evidenced by the 2 day rebound of stock prices on Wall Street which pretty much erased the losses earlier in the week).  Confidence is back.  Good old Uncle Sam to the rescue.  Here's what it really means:

With the money that you and I (probably you because I'm a poor comic) put into the federal government was used to erase horribly irresponsible fiscal behavior.  This is beyond debate.  Lots of smart folks saw this credit crisis coming years ago, some saw it recently, whatever the case, enough people knew this was coming to have prevented a national and international financial crisis for the US.

Take The Economist, in 2005, they called the housing bubble bursting because it was obvious to them, even then, because people were borrowing beyond their means, lenders were lining up ('when banks compete you win!'  Heard that slogan before?) to toss money at anyone who wanted it, and the market was so inflated, a collapse was imminent.  They also said this would lead to a wave of 'failures'.  Yup.

There are more but this is not an I told you so.  What it really is, at its core, is an old boys club trying to stay on their surfboards as the latest wave lines their pockets, increases their margins, and keeps them rich.  Long term fiscal solvency, once a staple of Wall Street giants like Lehman Brothers, was cashed in long ago.  No one went against the tide.  It's easy to say they should have known better.  Even if I did know better, I am not paid for that knowledge.  There are people who's job it is to predict things like this and if they did predict it, no one listened.

Now, here is why this government bailout is wrong:

-It's corporate welfare.  You know how people complain about 'white collar criminals' serving easy sentences when they stole millions and regular criminals doing hard time because they robbed a grand from one person?  Where here you go.  The giants screw up, we pay.  Note that if said giant recovers and thrives, you and I will never see that money but that's secondary.

-The US has moved away from LBJ's social welfare state.  We're not in the business of saying, 'Hey you screwed up, here are all your losses back and some money to start again'.  It's about risk.  Where are the FDIC bailouts for small businesses and a nearly extinct middle class?  It's silly right?  Guy opens a bar, the bar fails because he charged $.50 per beer, he gets all his money back from the government.  That would never happen right?  

-It's obvious to those of you that are politically oriented that I'm a fiscal conservative.  To that end, I have always believed the greatest factor in economics is consumer confidence.  If people feel like they are getting value, they spend and all is well.  Now in the short term, we've got that with the bailout.  I'd trade the short term high five party for a dependable market long term.  We have literally put a finger in the damn with a 1000 leaks and are calling the problem fixed.  Once we wake up after the weekend, no one can afford to fill up their gas tanks, homes are still being foreclosed at record rates and we're paying more for less.

-Philosophically, I loathe government intervention to make up for irresponsible behavior.  In the same way I hate the idea of someone receiving more welfare for more poor decisions, I hate the idea of Wall Street cronies who've cost the nation billions so they can go back to business as usual, getting bailed out.  This is a slippery slope people.  Alarms should be going off as this happened on a conservative president's watch (albeit that watch was blindfolded, drunk, and locked in a basement with loud sitar music blaring).  

-Here's the last thing I'll say about this.  Confidence and hope are great things.  They really are.  But would you rather build a house of cards or one made of steel that was hard to build?  Right now, we're choosing the card house.  We'd rather people feel good about themselves then do the right thing for the long term health of our country.  I find this step taken by our government to be a slap in the face to the thousands of Americans who are scraping to get by.   The market was crashing and we fixed it... for now.  

Spoiled

That's how I feel right now.  I counted it up and I did 13 sets in 10 days when I was out west in Seattle and Vancouver.  My comedy experiences in both cities was just incredible.

Seattle: This is a true comedy community.  The story, the basic one that is, goes like this.  The big club in town wasn't run very well.  The manager wasn't great about local talent and generally left a lot to be desired.  So instead of competing with each other for a few scraps from the table, the comics came together and worked their butts off.  They started their own scene, worked out deals with venues and sponsors, and really started something special.  Their shows draw GREAT comedy crowds and it was fantastic to perform out there.  Now, the Peoples Republic of Komedy is a brand name that has carved out a permanent home in Seattle.  It's big enough that they have their own section in an enormous festival that features acts from all across the country.

They took hold of their own comedy destiny.  I met a bunch of fabulous comics out there that are products of this great scene.  The amount of work they put in is staggering compared to the meager efforts that guys like me have ever done.  Really inspiring.  My final thought on this is that no one out there would ever sh*t on guys like Curt Schackelford; someone that gives stagetime should be supported.  Even if a majority of the comics don't like the way he books/runs his room, he has created a viable scene outside of the Club Monopoly.  This is super important.

Vancouver: One of the most beautiful cities in the world.  The comedy club is perfect.  Seriously.  It's a perfect club.  It was designed for comedy and it is the most fun place to work ever.  The worst night there this past weekend is still better than anywhere else I've worked.  I spent each day walking around outside taking in some badass scenery.  They have it all: mountains, beach, river/bay/ocean, great architecture, and green space.  Also, the club has popcorn that you can snack on.  Popcorn.

Why don't you just move there Danny?  You want to know why?  Because the coins matter.  I hate change (and not just things being altered, I do get uncomfortable with things being different).  I cannot stand it.  I hate coins.   I hate keeping track of them, dealing with them, and using them.  In Canada, like Europe, they have dollar coins.  They also have 2 dollar coins.  2!  So annoying.  You could be holding 9$ in coins and barely even know it.  I cannot keep track of them and that's why I could never live in Canada.  Is that the only reason?  Yes.  100%.  That's it and it is beyond negotiation.

Back in NYC now.  Got some stuff coming up.  Look for some new podcasts soon.  Should be fun.

Bumbershoot...It's Gone

Awesome.  What a great f-ing time I had here in Seattle, the windy apple.  They have a good scene out here and it was really cool to be welcomed so readily.  I would encourage the DC scene to act accordingly.  A bunch of guys came in from NY and LA and the Seattle guys welcomed us with open arms.  We got to perform on incredible shows in front of packed houses.  I hope to acquire some video documenting these things.

For the fest itself, it is superbly run.  All the comedy shows were sold out, people could afford to attend them, and the shows themselves were run effectively by people that know comedy.  Our show, Sweet Haven, was a juggernaut of happy.  Everyone had great sets, the running sketch was a home run, and the crowd loved us.  We had people coming up to us into the next day telling us how much fun they had.  It felt great.  Every comic should get the chance to have a great show in front of a packed out theater full of willing people.  It was like a gift.

I was able to get stage time at a club called Mainstage...which is unfortunately going out of business but that's not the point.  The point is, they didn't have to give me 2 sets and they did.  Cool people over there.

I'm off to Vancouver on Thursday to work my favorite club in the world, the Vancouver Yuk Yuk's.  This place is a comedy machine.  I can't wait.

NYC, prepare for my homecoming on Sunday.

NFL starts Thursday.  My Skins are a 5-11 team.  We'll see if they finish that way.

Seattle and Some Thoughts

It's been a while.  That's my fault.  Here's what I have going on and some thoughts in a quick hit style:

-I'm going to Seattle tomorrow for the Bumbershoot Festival.  I'm really excited to perform out there.  I've become friends with some Seattle guys and the scene sounds really cool.  I'm also excited to drink coffee.

-I bought a Mac.  I bought it out of anger.  I got so mad at my Dell laptop that I went online and bought the Macbook I'm using now.  Note: it's awesome.  One upgrade I put in was to increase the RAM to 4G instead of the standard 2G.  I love speed.  It's the most important thing to me by far.  I'm sure there is a pretty hard and fast rule about 'purchasing major things out of anger'.  Whatevs.

-Just wanted to make a quick comment on my buddy Joe Robinson no longer being employed by 98 Rock.  Joe as handled this situation with nothing but class.  While Joe was there, he was an enormous asset to local comics.  His show was a great place for guys to showcase themselves in an environment where guys 'got it'.  Along with his partner Theo, Joe created a phenomenal outlet for comics to entertain a radio audience.  He facilitated, put in more than he got back, and sacrificed whatever he had to in order for the show to work.  I can tell you 1st hand experience from being down in Cancun with the show that it was really good.  It's a shame (and Joe has covered this on his blog) that the show was probably doomed from the start.  But everyone should know that it was no fault of Joe's.  

-I'm also excited to go back to my favorite comedy club on Earth, the Vancouver Yuk Yuks.  I'm there the week after Bumbershoot

-Sweet Haven (the NY show I'm involved in) will be on hiatus for a month or so until we all get back from out west.  We were going strong at Rififi until it closed and now we are back at square one searching for a venue.  It's hard.  Not impossible, just hard.

-I did a show at a new club last night.  The crowd was small but I actually had a good time with them.  It was one of those shows where, in years past, I might have dropped my energy and mailed it in so I didn't look foolish.  I didn't do that which gave me some satisfaction.  It's the biggest thing I struggle with so it's exciting to feel like I've grown as a comic.

-I'm really disappointed in Obama's choice of Biden.  It was a move, in my mind that was not indicative of his campaign to this point.  It reeks of 'over thinking'.  To me, it looked like a move to win Pennsylvania as Biden is from Scranton and is known as the 3rd PA Senator.  While that doesn't seem terribly flawed, Biden has been in Washington for 36 years.  He is an inside the beltway man.  This is in conflict with the 'change we can believe in' mantra.  Biden is a business as usual limousine liberal which doesn't go with what Obama has presented to this point.  Biden does have TONS of foreign policy experience which could be an asset but it looks like a panic move.  'What is the criticism against us? That we don't have experience. OK, get someone with experience'  Kaine or Bayh.  Don't play down to your opponent.  You don't change who you are because of who you are going against, you play your game.  It worked in the primary bruh.  You beat the bitch with the energy of your volunteers, new voters, a simple message, and better strategy.  

-I also believe that Biden will cost Obama at some point.  He is prone to spouting off and saying inappropriate things.  He is also a well documented plagiarist.  Does it bode well that the Repubs are happy with the selection?  Don't forget that Biden said: 'I don't think he's ready' during the primaries.  I don't see this partnership working well.

-I also think McCain is about to make the same kind of mistake with Mitt Romney.  Attempting to win some support in Michigan and appealing to the conservative base.  Just be the maverick, pick Lieberman and be who you are.  My boy attorney Jon also suggested Kay Bailey Hutchinson who might help bring the evilbitch Dems over to McCain's side.

-That's what I got for now.  Thanks for reading.

Peoples Republic of Komedy Radio Blog

PROK TALK.

Here it be:

Sweet Haven is Weekly Starting in July!

It's because we brought it. What.

Stay tuned for updates.

Sweet Haven on Sunday

Check it. It's going to be amazing:

The B*tch Is Back

She never left I guess. In fact, she won't leave. I hate her. God I hate her so much. I'm not saying her name because I don't want the google ads on the page to appear so that anyone reading will be tempted to go to her dumb website. I will just say that her name ryhmes with Shmillary Flinton and she should be taken to a far away location.

I try to be a pretty understanding guy; meaning, I always like to argue 'the devil's advocate' position or attempt to identify with an opposing viewpoint (as a side, I know I'm stubborn/obstinate/obtuse, I'm just saying that even in my convictions, I can often understand where the counters are...even if they are wrong and my beliefs empirically correct). That said, I literally cannot see how someone can support this woman. Shmillary tops herself every week. This information isn't just for insiders, it's available to the public.

Take the Michigan/Florida gong shows for example.

Both states were upset that the initial primary states (New Hampshire/Iowa/South Carolina) had too much influence. They wanted their states to be in the national conversation. This is a valid concern. It is. Because the 1st states have to be first, we now start our primary season in January. Absurd. It takes way too long. And why should these select states have this arbitrary huge influence while states like Michigan and FLA are afterthoughts? This is a great debate. Just not for right now.

The Democratic Party (via the DNC) of which Shmillary Flinton said again last night that she is 'COMMITTED' to, voted to strip MI and FL of their delegate votes if they moved up their primaries. The states did so the DNC did what they said they would do. All the candidates involved in the primary who are able to gain a platform because of the Democratic party agreed to remove their names from the ballot...except for that absolute snake Shmillary Flinton who in her black and evil heart knew that she might be able to twist the crusade of each state that has a legitimate beef with the current system into some kind of leverage for her campaign to suck all the life out of the universe. So there we were, sighting flighty stats like exit polls and 'voter intent', Shmillary's people are asking for the rules to be changed after the game ended. Amazing.

I bet you want an analogy to elucidate this. Well giddyup.

A major league baseball game is played. The visiting team loses 5-4. The visiting team, after the game is over files a protest with major league baseball, not that the home team cheated mind you but something to the effect of 'the distance of 90 feet between the bases is arbitrary. Why not 89 ft or 95 ft?' Then, the visiting team wanted the base hits they got in batting practice to count for their final result in the game. No one else was on the field but those were good hits!!!!

I am still in shock that there was a compromise. Counting half the delegates was such a cop-out. It was just a way to say: 'Look Shmillary, we gave you something' because they knew she would still ultimately lose....or would she?

She still can't say it. She asked for $ last night. She is trying to decide how to angle for the VP nomination or to run as an independent after using the Democratic party for the last several years. She repeats her '18 million votes' total every chance she gets. If she is the VP nominee, I will not vote for Obama. Period. She needs to go away...like to hell where they have lots of sniper fire and pandering. I f*cking hate her more than I hate social injustice, fear, excessive heat and when girls respond to game from terrible dudes named 'Wynn' or 'Yardley'.

GO AWAY!

PS. In case you wondering who the picture is of, it's how I picture Shmillary Flinton. It's an immortal inherently evil being named Morgoth for Middle Earth. Sauron was a captain in his army as Morgoth ruled the free peoples of Middle Earth in the darkest age in the history of the world. I used this photo because I couldn't find one of 'Ungoliant' the wicked giant spider that spins darkness from her foul womb to cover the world in sadness.

Wednesday of '05

I was trying to think of something to write about today and decided to go over some old blogs for inspiration. I came across this piece and had an amazing time recalling the event that inspired it:

Its from September of '05:

Mexican Restaurants and Dremos

Stunning. That is the only word I can think of to describe the show I did Sunday night. I did a Christian Comedy night at a Mexican restaurant in Germantown. I could not make that up. There was gospel music playing before the show started and the intro I had to memorize for the headliner went just like this: "Here she is, all the way from Springfield, VA. She's here to bless you. Please put your hands together and praise the lord... ____________ (her name)"

She then sang some gospel music and the people loved it. No one in the place liked my jokes. The very nice lady who put the show together promised the crowd that none of the comics would make fun of the audience. After my jokes drew zero laughs, I resorted to making fun of the audience. There was a freshman in high school there and I gave him the tools to be the most popular kid in class for at least one day. His dad was cool and laughed at the appropriate times so he really stood out.

I called out one guy because he wouldn't clap and made it so awkward that he had no choice but to clap. I won. One of the comics ate a piece of chicken on stage and then did hurricane jokes. I will recommend him to the Boston Comedy Festival. Zing! It still hurts goddamnit.

End old post.

This was shortly after I had been bounced right out of the Boston Comedy Festival in the 1st round. The chick that won on that show was just terrible. And yet...I went back the next year. Good call.

Back to the Christian show. I mean wow. I had totally forgotten about this. What an astounding event. This lady didn't really tell jokes. I don't really know how to describe it. Here's a loose recollection of something she might have said:

"y'all know when them boys is outside...them little boys outside just gettin' dirty...y'all know you be freakin' out...good lord have mercy praise his name you be freakin' out...you be in that house losin' yo' mind girl...'I know you ain't comin' in the house with mud on them shoes!' Lord have mercy bless his holy name..."

I wish I remembered her name so that you could look it up. I didn't want to put it in the original post because it might have gotten back to her but I think the statue of limitations is up on that fear. But, I forget things. And yes, as I've mentioned before, I have ADD. Take that anonymous poster that hates me.

How Could Anyone Not Like You Jerry?

I've come to learn that there are some people that don't like me. For someone who's entire life, literally, is based on the acceptance of others, this is hard to take. I cannot stand it; repeat, cannot stand it, when I know someone doesn't like me. Even if I don't like that person, I am driven crazy if I perceive any dislike from said party.

Recently, I posted a guest blog on the really cool DC Comedy blog. The guys that run this blog do a great job of keeping content going and posting things (not always popular) that spawn discussion. My buddy sent out an email asking for some content. I had something on my mind so I threw it together and sent it off. I don't think it was the best written piece I've ever constructed but I felt like it was a decent expression of what I hoped would be a pretty simple message.

You can read the post and the wealth of angry responses here. The comments are really interesting. Here's what typically happens on this site:

-Someone will post something that is thoughtful and worth discussing. It may not be a popular stance or opinion but it is usually well thought out and from a comic with a valuable perspective.
-Some will agree or disagree
-An anonymous person will attack the person/blog with things that have very little to do with the posting.
-The poster or others that have commented will engage in a written feud with this anonymous person that goes on for a day or two until a new post goes up

That's pretty much what happened when I put up my post. The anonymous commenter (or at least one of them) clearly knows me. He/she also clearly does not like me. The anger in the comments is clear. My point (again, I wish I was more eloquent and clear in my writing) was that it's easy to blame others about why you are not getting the stagetime/shows you want. I see that as selfish and an easy way out. I encourage comics to make their own opportunities because we are not owed anything. Complaining about the manner in which someone books a show is a waste of time as it is that person's show. He/she books the way they book. A booker can book however they want. They can book terribly (often the norm) or they can book great. Either way, they (bookers) do not owe comics anything. We are dependent upon them. My contention is that we have to find a way to make our own breaks instead of complaining about the way that a person runs his/her room.

One possibility is that the anonymous person is a friend of mine who is doing an amazing job f-ing with me. The other, and the possibility that I believe, is that this person really doesn't like me. Something about me and/or this site so drives this person to such levels of anger, that he/she has no choice but to make the harshest comments possible. I refused to get into the kind of digital shouting match that quickly devolves into the 'why don't you kill yourself f@ggot!?!?' It was just incredible to me to watch this play out.

There are some who assumed I was directing the post at specific targets and because I didn't specify anyone, was 'calling out' certain guys. Confusing? I don't get it either.

The thing that gets me I guess is how quickly this devolved. I tried to say, 'stop feeling sorry for yourself and go make it happen'. Somehow, it meant I was calling everyone a hack, telling newbies to quit, and had never offered a kind word to anyone in my 4.5 years of struggling as a comic in an area that is really tough for comics to make it big in. I won't waste any more space responding to these kind of shots because it can only come across as defensive. I'd just offer that I disagree.


That's it and that's all.

Sweethaven Bootleg Video

We snuck a camera into the 1st Sweethaven Show at Rififi. This Zapruda like footage captures some of the absurdity.

Specter on Spygate...How About Seattle Bruh!

Am I satisfied with the investigation...I said no, no, no.

Try to make me believe its over...I say no, no, no.

Sen A Specter from PA is not cool with how the NFL handled this whole thing. Know what? Neither am I. I'm just not stoked to go federal on this piece. The real issue here is that pro sports leagues, despite the big words and demonstrative speaches, have dwindling accountability. They are the only 'game' in town and that's how they behave. I think this is the larger issue here. Forget Spygate (actually don't. I couldn't believe how easy the despicable Pats got off. And it's not just the video stuff; they thumb their noses at league rules and no one says squat).

If it takes the federal government to bring some accountability to pro sports, then I guess it has to happen. To me, this whole Spygate thing is way down the list of important things. What is happening in Seattle, with a criminal group of billionaires robbing the city of a team is a far more critical issue. That's where Congress should be stepping in. Interstate commerce and such. Another place I'd like to see some action is that if a team, as judged by an independent commission (I'd be on it with some other people) went 4 straight years without really trying to get better or made more than 2 indefensible trades, the franchise would immediately go to someone else with the owner not being allowed to profit.

Now listen, no one loves justice for scumbags more than I do. I'm a huge fan of Roger Clemens getting taken to the woodshed, of Barry Bonds going to jail, and of the Pats losing in the Super Bowl and the Eagles never winning one (zinger). It just sucks that it takes Congressional hearings for us to get some sense of accountability from sports leagues that hold us hostage.