I Hit A Woman With My Car

Yup. I did. This morning, coming to work, I was inching forward...looking left...
waiting for traffic to pass...inched forward...looking left...
inch forward...look right...nothing...look left...cars coming...inch...inch...right...nothing...let...cars...inch...
right...nothing...left...inch...Clear...oh SH*T!

A woman was crossing in front of me. She was literally 6 inches from the front of my car. The crosswalk was well behind me. She passed in front of my car. When it was clear, I moved about 4 feet before I stopped. She was 6 inches from my car when I started. This means I hit her if you can't visualize it. Instead of going onto the hood as you'd expect, she literally bounced off my car went into the air and landed 2 feet in front of my car. Which means she traveled almost 6 feet sideways and landed on her feet. I'm not rocking a porsche, so the acceleration wasn't melting my face off, but still, solid impact.

I get out of the car, completely freaked out. Conversation here:

Me: "Oh my God, are you OK?"

Lady that had just been hit by a CAR! (LTHJBAC!): ".......Ummmmm, (patting herself on the legs and arms like she lost her car keys) yeah...I...Yeah"

Me: "Oh my God, I am so sorry! Are you sure that...I mean you're OK?"

LTHJBAC!: (Still patting herself in disbelief) "Yeah...yeah...I'm OK"

Me: "Do you need me to call you an ambulance or anything?"

LTHJBAC!: (patting...) "No...no...I think...No, I'm OK"

Me: "Oh my Gosh...Well...can I help you with anything? Can I carry your bags? (If you said awkward, you're right!)

LTHJBAC!: (still....patting) "No...Its OK...I'm just going right there (building is 9 feet away)"

Me: "I'm so sorry...I was inching out in traffic...I mean, I never saw you...I was...I mean I thought that someone would go behind me if they...I am so sorry..."

LTHJBAC!: "No...yeah...Its OK...I'm OK...(patting)

Me: "Do you want my insurance information or something?" (What's or something? Is she supposed to say 'no insurance, but I would like some fashionable outerwear'...man I'm an idiot)

LTHJBAC!: (stops patting...) "No...I...No...I'm fine...Its fine...Let's be more careful..." (resumes patting)

Me: "OK, I am so sorry...I'm glad you're OK...so...OK...Well...All right...(she starts walking to her building. Do I say goodbye?)...Ummm...Take it Easy (Good one a$$)

That was my morning.

Out.