Unreal Talent

Despite the fact that everyone, including myself bombed at Topaz last night, I came to a realization yesterday. Well, I already knew it so I re-realized it. I have never just alized anything which I guess must mean that you learn it because when you realize something it means you discover something that you really knew already. What?

Here it is: The DC Area has some absolutely amazing talent. Fact. Look at the dccomedyfest website. Look at the show schedules. On Friday, April 7 at 7PM at HR-57, there is a collection of local comics who will be auditioning for a spot on the Letterman show. Most would say that young comics like these listed, would not be ready for such a thing. You know what? We are.

Check this lineup of comics out: Ryan Conner, Alicia Gomes, Doug Powell, Danny Rouhier, Rory Scovel, Seaton Smith, Randolph T, Justin Schlegel & Chris White. Every one of these comics (please exclude yours truly from this discussion), is unique and as talented as anyone else in the business.
I've seen the hacky road-headliners that come through the B+ clubs and do their jokes about prescription drugs ("A 4 hour erection? That's a party!!!), gay bashing, and smoking weed. That's fine. None of these comics will ever be like that.

Don't believe me? Ryan Conner, who has been doing standup about as long as I have but has way more show experience, rolled up into the comedy mecca (The Comedy Cellar in New York), the place where seasoned pros would love to work, the place where Robin Williams likes to stop in and do a set but has to wait his turn. Ryan rolled in there this past weekend and destroyed the place. Why? Because he is f*cking gifted. Also, when I hang out with him, the ladies always sweat him and ask me about him. "I'm not your gay friend," I reply with the sour taste of jealousy in my mouth.

I would trust that entire list of comics (except myself, as I believe I would implode before going on stage) to go up there and crush as well. That list doesn't even include my boys like Jon Mumma who is one of my favorite people, not just comics, but people to watch as he is naturally hilarious. That list could include even more amazing comics like Frank Hong, Jeff "Everyday that I'm not a professional writer is a waste' Maurer, and others. I could go on about each person on that list as to why they are amazing because that is what they are. It blows my mind that there are this many incredibly talented people here. DC Comedyfest, April 6-8. See about us.

Next issue:

I have gotten together a couple of times with a few of my buddies and played some pretty competitive games of touch football with another group of friends. Its all been fun and a good way to get some exercise. There was some good natured sh*t-talking taking place in the form of some drunken phone calls and discussing the outcome of the game to girls and such. Well, it has escalated a bit over email and its now difficult to tell if one of the opposing team members is serious about his talking. Stuff like: "If you think I'm a coward, say it to my face", or "you know where to find me". Awkward. Especially awkward considering the reason his team lost the last game was because he couldn't cover a statue with a blanket. My team happens to feature 4 D1 athletes. We are all obviously not as athletic as we were back then but every one of us, when it mattered, achieved on the field (my boy was a 2-time national champ in lax at Princeton).

The result is that we all feel comfortable in some good natured chatter. The other dude does not feel as comfortable...so he quoted stats from his first game that his team one. Touch football stats? Wow. Catch you later on when we build the fire and grunt before the pissing contest starts. Easy there Security Sam, your friends still like you.

Last news bit, On Friday, March 10, I'm doing a show at Williams College in Williamstown, MA. Really pumped about this. Note to colleges: book me, pay me more than triple what I'd actually do the show for, so that I can quit my 9-5. Williams College Ephs. I wonder if they use that like 'Smurf'.

"Hey dude."
-"Hey"
"Oh yeah man, how'd it go with Sarah?"
-"Oh Eph man, friggin Eph. Totally Eph'd her."
"Oh Eph yeah, you friggin Eph, that is so Eph"
-"Yup. Eph'd right in the Eph"
"Wanna go Eph some Sundaes?"
-"Eph'-n-'eh I do"