Was That About Me?

Blogging is dangerous. People I know read this thing and most times there is someone at the butt of a joke, portrayed negatively, or mocked I often get the question: 'Was that about me?'

Sometimes it was...other times it was and I didn't tell you that it was because I am a pansy...still other times it had nothing to do with that person. This time, it does...

MANDY, THIS IS ABOUT YOU:

I had a conversation with a funnydanny gat (gmail chat) favorite today. She was voted 'most sophisticated' in high school. I did not go to the type of school where awards like this were handed out but hearing about hers made me wish I had.

Dictionary Definition: Sophisticated: 'Having acquired worldly knowledge or refinement; lacking natural simplicity or naiveté'

She is from Tennessee...

Sorry, I just fainted due to the overload of jokes that entered my head. To be labeled as most sophisticated in a Tennessee town is like being named 'tallest' at a midget conference. Half my family is from Alabama. When I went to my cousin's wedding, I received the following driving directions:

"OK, y'all are going on y'all highway until y'all see a y'all water plant y'all. Then there's a y'all McCormick and Shmidt y'all in a shopping 'y'all center. Keep y'all going straight and as soon as y'all see a dirt pile turn left and y'all will be on our street...y'all."

Me: "Are there any street names?"

(Long pause...............)

Me: "....... ya'll..."

Now, that is not to say that the young lady in question isn't sophisticated. Quite the contrary; she is as sophisticated as they come as far as I know. I just found humor in the honor...

End Mandy Portion.

Frustrating Business Item of the Day:

I get really irritated at people who ask me questions about something I have nothing to do with and get frustrated when I can't give them answers. Lady came by my office this morning because no one was at the meeting she was scheduled for. Long story short she starts asking me about all these names. I have heard of exactly 0.
She is stunned by this, so she then asks me what the status is of the latest 'HR TPCP 2 H Requirements Meeting' is...oh let me grab that number...yeah, 0.
She is now fully flustered and demands that I call one of the people in charge of the meeting. I A) don't know them B) don't have their info. When I ask for it, she gets even more irritated and gives me a number.
I call it. I have no idea who this person is or what I am even calling about.
The person answers and says: "Hello this is ______. How can I help you?"
I say: "You know what, I really have no idea. (to the woman in my office) Why am I calling her?"
Office Woman (incensed): "Ask here what the status is for the JFC3 Integrated Work Group Meeting is."
Me: "Ummm do you know the status of the ummmm... J (mumble mumble) 3 Integration Group meeting is"
Phone woman: "I've never heard of that meeting."
Me to office woman: "She's never heard of that meeting."
Office Woman: (biting sigh of displeasure)...Well you didn't say the right meeting."
Me: "Would you like to speak with her? Because I really have no idea what you're talking about."
Office Woman: "......(Sigh) Fine..."

They talked on the phone for 10 seconds. Situation averted, the meeting is tomorrow. Why was I involved in that at all? Ridiculous. I count down the days until I can make enough money to support myself as a comedian. The goal is 2022. Countdown is on.