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Wednesday, October 24, 2007

The Get Fresh Crew

I blog to tell you a story. Most won't appreciate it. Those that do will think it the tightness.

Last week, I'm at an event. It was a charity event. It was winding down. I was about to leave. A man walks into the place. The venue was huge and wondrous. I'm booking it for my birthday (funny danny note: no I'm not. It would cost more than I could potentially make in 47 years). The dude that walks in is on an iphone. He is also typing on a sidekick. He is not who he once was. I recognize him but I am still not sure it's who I think it is...that was a confusing sentence.

The man, who is a good 40 pounds heavier than when I first bought his audio cassette tape many years ago. He looks around the room...he isn't sure where to go. Someone guides him over to the registration desk. He meanders over to the unknowing chicks managing the station. They ask him his name...

He pauses from his phone call...and his sidekick. He looks up and says: "Doug E Fresh". The chicks have no idea who he is. One asks: 'OK...it's Mr. Fresh?'

He repeats his name. It is awkward. I am watching this whole scene unfold and I roll over quickly and say:

"ladies, this is Doug E Fresh. I own all his cassette tapes."

He responds: 'Aaaiiight. Where I go to?'

I took him over to where the VIPs had been hanging out earlier. Most have cleared out as the event was winding down. There were several athletes present including several former greats.

Fast forward. Doug E Fresh is talking to the guy that put on the event. I spoke to the organizer earlier and he calls me over. The two of them are talking and name dropping. I don't have much to contribute. I finally jump in during a lull. Here is the convo:

Me: 'Doug, lemme ask you this. You've been in the game for so long, do you ever get wowed by a star? Like, Derrick Jeter was here earlier; is that impressive to you or is not a big deal?'

DEF: 'I mean, das like...I mean, I make raps. No-what-I'msayin', I make raps. Most da time, it's like nah son. I done that. But man, you meet dat dude and das' like: 'that n_ _ _ a made world series.'

Me: 'I totally understand.'

DEF: 'I came in and brought that knowledge. Them guys that was doin' it strong when I was young is like wow. Tony Dorsett was in here. That's one of the best running backs of all time.'

Me: 'Actually Doug, if you'll indulge me, I think it's irresponsible to place him among the great running backs of all time.'

(At this point, the organizer is looking at me like I'm a space alien on stilts taking a piss on a parade.)

DEF: 'Oh damn!'

Me: 'If you give me 10 seconds, I'll name you 5 better right now.'

DEF: 'Aight yo.'

Me: 'Walter Payton, Jim Brown, Barry Sanders, Gayle Sayers, Marshall Faulk'

DEF: 'Daaaaammmmmmn!'

(more looks of insanity from the organizer)

Me: 'I'll name 5 more right now. Eric Dickerson, Emmit Smith, Earl Campbell, Marcus Allen, and OJ Simpson; 2000 in a 14 game season!'

DEF: 'Oh sh*t son! Bringing dat noise...'

Me: 'I just can't stand it when a guy plays on great teams and is great by association. Dorsett was fine, but just because he was on great teams, don't anoint him into the pantheon. The thing he's most famous for is getting caught by Darrell Green on Monday Night Football.'

To summarize, I had a sports debate with Doug E Fresh (from the Get Fresh Crew) and I lectured him about how I believe that a cowboy was overrated. Personal highlight.

7 comments:

Mike said...

Dorsett was fine? Fine. Haha. Let me guess, if he were a skin, running behind the hogs, he would be a legitimate hall of famer, instead of just "fine". Oh and, he may be most famous for "running for a 99 yard TD against Minnesota on MNF." (Fixed that for ya.)
Maybe you should stick to commenting on comedy.

Unknown said...

Dorsett is overrated. He's the Cowboys equivalent to Redskins "great" George Rogers, maybe Timmy Smith. You hit the nail on the head, and I'm very happy you were able to share this knowledge with Mr. Fresh.

Mike said...

Based on Danny's criteria, Art Monk was only "fine" because he was on a great team. Personally, I've always thought Monk should be in the hall, and I'm a Cowboy fan.-Mike

Danny Rouhier said...

Mike: Art Monk played on terrible teams and great teams and held NFL records. Dorsett played on one of the great teams of all time and is great by association. Point is, every dude I named to Doug E Fresh was better than Dorsett. If you were drafting a team, you'd take all those guys first or you'd be irresponsible.

Mike said...

Actually, The Skins winning percentage was 58% while Monk was there. The bad years came after Gibbs had given up on them and left because he knew the cupboard was bare talent wise. Monk made his bones on very good teams. They had one losing team (7-9) during Gibbs tenure. Dallas winning percentage was 62% during the Dorsett years, with one terrible year at the end. Just because you can name RB's that are better than TD, that hardly makes him just "fine". I can name about 20 recievers as good or better than Monk. Does that make Monk "fine"?
/I hope you're doing well in NYC.-Mike

Q.Ledbetter said...

You talked sports with Doug E. Fresh, who is a hero of mine. That makes you my hero, by brief association.

Drumm said...

Just because Danny was associated with a hero of yours, does not make him a hero Quincy. That is just irresponsible....I could name at least 20 people who have talked with Dougie Doug that are way better than Danny (starting with Busy Bee...continuing with the entire "Self-Destruction - Stop The Violence All-Stars" cast....and ending with Dee - Host of "Pump It Up").