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Tuesday, May 20, 2008

How Could Anyone Not Like You Jerry?


I've come to learn that there are some people that don't like me. For someone who's entire life, literally, is based on the acceptance of others, this is hard to take. I cannot stand it; repeat, cannot stand it, when I know someone doesn't like me. Even if I don't like that person, I am driven crazy if I perceive any dislike from said party.

Recently, I posted a guest blog on the really cool DC Comedy blog. The guys that run this blog do a great job of keeping content going and posting things (not always popular) that spawn discussion. My buddy sent out an email asking for some content. I had something on my mind so I threw it together and sent it off. I don't think it was the best written piece I've ever constructed but I felt like it was a decent expression of what I hoped would be a pretty simple message.

You can read the post and the wealth of angry responses here. The comments are really interesting. Here's what typically happens on this site:

-Someone will post something that is thoughtful and worth discussing. It may not be a popular stance or opinion but it is usually well thought out and from a comic with a valuable perspective.
-Some will agree or disagree
-An anonymous person will attack the person/blog with things that have very little to do with the posting.
-The poster or others that have commented will engage in a written feud with this anonymous person that goes on for a day or two until a new post goes up

That's pretty much what happened when I put up my post. The anonymous commenter (or at least one of them) clearly knows me. He/she also clearly does not like me. The anger in the comments is clear. My point (again, I wish I was more eloquent and clear in my writing) was that it's easy to blame others about why you are not getting the stagetime/shows you want. I see that as selfish and an easy way out. I encourage comics to make their own opportunities because we are not owed anything. Complaining about the manner in which someone books a show is a waste of time as it is that person's show. He/she books the way they book. A booker can book however they want. They can book terribly (often the norm) or they can book great. Either way, they (bookers) do not owe comics anything. We are dependent upon them. My contention is that we have to find a way to make our own breaks instead of complaining about the way that a person runs his/her room.

One possibility is that the anonymous person is a friend of mine who is doing an amazing job f-ing with me. The other, and the possibility that I believe, is that this person really doesn't like me. Something about me and/or this site so drives this person to such levels of anger, that he/she has no choice but to make the harshest comments possible. I refused to get into the kind of digital shouting match that quickly devolves into the 'why don't you kill yourself f@ggot!?!?' It was just incredible to me to watch this play out.

There are some who assumed I was directing the post at specific targets and because I didn't specify anyone, was 'calling out' certain guys. Confusing? I don't get it either.

The thing that gets me I guess is how quickly this devolved. I tried to say, 'stop feeling sorry for yourself and go make it happen'. Somehow, it meant I was calling everyone a hack, telling newbies to quit, and had never offered a kind word to anyone in my 4.5 years of struggling as a comic in an area that is really tough for comics to make it big in. I won't waste any more space responding to these kind of shots because it can only come across as defensive. I'd just offer that I disagree.


That's it and that's all.

6 comments:

Unknown said...

I don't think it's so much that people don't like you, it's that people don't like hearing that maybe they're not very good at comedy. And that message could be inferred from your blog; you were basically saying that maybe bookers have a reason to avoid booking certain comics. Which I would agree with: if you can't make the cut at Curt's shows, he's probably (though not definitely) right about you not being very good. But that's a harsh truth that a lot of people don't want to hear.

Danny Rouhier said...

Who do you think you are Jeffrey? Seriously, fix your blogger profile Jeff.

I hear what you are saying. I know that people might not like hearing anything negative. I just see a difference between 'I don't agree with what he said'/'I think it's arrogant and condescending' vs 'We get it Danny, you have ADD and everyone is a hack and we should all quit'/he's never said a kind word to anyone'

Man that was muddled. I'm a really bad writer.

Unknown said...

The first rule of irrational counterarguments is: get personal. Attack the person, not the message. I don't think it's surprising that things went in that direction.

Good point about my blogger profile: I will change it to "Geoffrey", or perhaps "Funny Geoffrey".

tenderkatie said...

There is a lot of angst, Roos. Middle school angst. Let it be :)

Jared said...

Dude...I read through the whole thread. Don't let the anonymous a-holes get you down. Just the ones that introduce themselves...

Conroy99 said...

I like you, Danny.