It Hurts My Eyes

After Dremos last night, I swung by my favorite local bar in DC, Town Hall. I met up with a couple girlfriends of mine who are all fantastic. Unfortunately, these fantastic ladies were under a barrage from dudes still wearing suits from work checking their blackberries every so often to give off an air of importance. I walked in and was easily the least dressed-up person in the room, which made me happy.

I got to talk to my friend Bridgette who I haven't seen in a while which was wonderful. We people-watched for many minutes and were stunned at some of the things we saw from this sea of awful dudes.

Question: why do Southern dudes always introduce themselves and their friends by their full names? "Hey, I'm Whitt Barnes, nice to meet you". Easy bruh, just give me the first name OK chief? I'm not gonna rush home and google you, I don't need the whole thing. I'm not going to remember your first name because you're a douchebag. I'm Danny. If we get close enough to have some further encounters that don't revolve around us seeing each other at a bar once every 6 weeks, I'll drop the last name on you. Until that point, stop giving out your business card to chicks and saying that 'we should grab lunch'. You shouldn't be allowed to have lunch. That should be the rule: you wear a suit to a bar, introduce yourself by your full name, and hand your business cards to girls, you are not allowed to eat lunch. Even trade-off.

The only time I do that is if I'm meeting someone's parents, interviewing for a job, or introducing myself to a superior. That is when you give the whole name. Not when you are hitting on 22 year olds at a dive bar.

It pains me that this is what my Capitol Hill honies see every day. They have to constantly deal with the dudes in this world and sometimes they get carried away with it because its all they see. So Lofty, Fergy, 'Jet', and my sister's boss this message is for you: 'Never forget that they are not us. There is more out there and you deserve it. Hide your eyes, close your ears and remember. Remember that its not cool to act like a 'political insider' to impress a chick. Remember that dudes who drop names like weights are fools. Remember that there is a whole world out there that is not on 'the list' and its pretty cool. I heart you guys.

******

Maryland Show on Friday night. My boy Ryan Conner and I are coming to campus to scald the mic. Ryan got the time wrong in his blog because he is a poo head...yup, brought the noise on you right there son. Show starts at 6:10 PM after a full day of events at 'Muhr-lan'. Baltimore Room. Matt Liebman, Matt Mayer, Ryan Conner and This Guy = The Hotness.