When The Mic Goes Out, It Is Sh*tty...

That is what the Boston Comedy Festival taught me this year. It is hard to have a complete set when the mic turns off in the midst of your closer. Nice. If you recall, last year upon getting back from this festival, I was furious. I could not believe the injustice that had befallen and blah blah blah. This year? I could care less.

Let me break it down for you. I saw 4 Preliminary Rounds of this contest (there are 8 total). Each prelim yields 2 winners who move on to the semifinals. Of the 8 winners I saw, I agreed with the judges on 1 of them. 1! So, the point is that it is hard to be disappointed when you are bewildered.

In my prelim, there was a lot of talent. A lot. It really could have been (or rather should have been) any one of 7-8 people out of 12. None of those people were chosen. One dude did some Blue Collar Comedy Tour stuff about 'big gas stations' vs 'small gas stations'. Watch out Arabs, a few zingers coming your way. The other dude that won was awful. Just awful. And this is something I am very sensitive about. Explanation......now:

The dude just did voices. Very little material, just voices. The voices were good. But we were told, specifically, that we would be judged on 'originality' of material...

This dude did Archie and Edith Bunker...f*cking Archie Bunker!

1) Relevance called, they wonder why you guys haven't met yet
2) Everyone can do that voice. Even my boy Ryan Conner who is especially not good at voices can do that voice. It is EASY!
3) Nothing original about that at all

If you had told me before I went on, I had to do (Deniro, the Bunkers, and a 'grandmother') I could have done that easily and better than the dude that did them. This guy should be performing at old folks homes not winning contests against 9 talented comics. I don't actually blame this dude though. Listen, he should know that he sucks and he should stop sucking but it is hard to blame the guy if he can have success! How can anyone who is supposed to judge comedy objectively look at that guy, then look at all the other comics who work their a$$es of 7 days a week so that they DON"T SOUND LIKE THAT GUY? Unreal to me. There were so many funny people at this festival and it is just a shame they can't do a better job of getting those people in front of audiences.

Here is the thing that I am sensitive about. My talent, yes singular, is impersonations. I am good at voices and picking up tendencies of people and re-creating them. A lot of comics, especially in a place that breeds intelligent humor like DC, pretty much label any impressions as hacky. I have struggled with this since the beginning of my little jaunt into the world of humor. My 'Schwarzeneggar' joke is funny (it isn't 'the governator' and he really is just the premise so I can get to the joke) but it turns people off because so many sh*tty comics do him that is cliche and thus, hackalicious. I have a good Croc Hunter, never seen the light of day. Same with my Walken, Pesci and Deniro; they are all in a closet somewhere. Here is my balancing act:

Side 1: I want to show people, every time I get on stage that I am talented. I want them to leave thinking: 'That dude with the red cheeks is really talented'. Which basically means, I want to show as much as I can everytime.

Side 2: I am scared to death that other comics will not think highly of me.

The conclusion? Arnold is done. Never again. I will not be able to get the vision of that astounding hack out of my head and it will torment me everytime. So, thanks Boston Comedy Festival Judges, you have given me a helpful direction with my comedy. Let that be a lesson to all of you, it is important to let the opinions of your peers shape everything you do without exception.

Huge Thanks to my boys Cos, Goldie, and Andes and my girls Dige and Marge for coming out to support. You guys are great.