Soooo Whatcha doooiiinn?

Here is what I am thinking about:

Ryan Conner performed last night on a broken leg that still had the bullets inside. He killed. That is a performance.

Doug Powell did something amazing last night. I have never been so entertained at an open mic. I can't explain it. It wasn't the funniest thing I have ever seen but I was so captivated. I think the crowd was too. They weren't laughing so much as they were transfixed on his performance. Incredible. I love that guy. He is never satisfied.

I went up with a few concepts last night and some ideas that I've tried out before. Not good. I think I may have one good thing out of all of it. Its about NASCAR. No comic ever talks about NASCAR. I am the only one. Take that, mix in my Shwarzeneggar (I don't care if its spelled wrong, you know who I am talking about bitches) impersonation, add my one joke about anal sex, steam/shake/cool/serve: You've got a directionless, hacky comic that should retire and go do 9-5 jobs with the rest of these a$$holes...No I didn't mean my office...I meant a figurative and metaphorical office where candy doesn't fall from the ceiling every half hour and bonuses are handed out for cheeriness and every movement made within the complex isn't watched like a prairie dog in the sights of a hawk.

I love my job.

Comics: Here is my advice for the day. Keep in mind that I am not good but here is what I know. If you go up and talk at the audience, like you're giving a speech, you are going to suck always. If you can make the audience think you're talking to them or at least make them comfortable with you, you are more likely to get laughs. Be engaging. There are certain people who's material really isn't that good but they still crush because they are being themselves and they are what's funny. Some people could read the phonebook and it could be hilarious. This brings me to my next point, if you are not naturally funny; meaning you weren't the funniest one of your friends or you are not the funniest one in your office or you are constantly surprised when people don't laugh at your amusing little quips, allow me to give you some advice: aahhheemmm

STOP DOING STANDUP ASSHOLE!

Thanks.